The homeless almighty

Feel as the God Almighty and the desperate homeless guy on the street at the same time.

Feel powerful, able, creative, and eternal as God &
embrace your loneliness, nothingness and freedom as the homeless guy.

Bir zamanlar kendimce karaladıklarım

Günlerden bir gün gecenin bir yarısı kendimce karaladığım bir şeyleri buldum ve paylaşmak istedim...

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Geçmişe bakıp "şimdiki aklım olsaydı" diyorsan buna sevin. Bu geliştiğine işarettir. Geçmişe dair pişmanlık duymaktan dolayı üzülmeyi bırak ve gelişimini kutla.

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Kendini sev, kabullen, olumluya odaklan diyenleri çok umursama. Gerektiğinde kendinden nefret et ama bunu fark etmeyi bil çünkü farkında olursan bunu kullanabilirsin. İnsan kendinden hiç nefret etmemişse başkasının kusurlarına gözünü kör edemez. Başkalarının kusurları arasında boğulmaktansa kendinden nefret edip o halden kendini yeni bir bilinçle çıkarmak yeğdir.

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Nasıl hissetmek istiyorsan o senin olman gerekendir. Bu hisleri yakala ve artırmaya bak. Ancak böyle kendin olursun.

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Olmak istediğin gibi görünmeyi dene bazen. Kendini kandırırsın bir süre sonra bakarsın o olmuşsun.

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İnsanları sınıflandırmayı öngören milliyetçilik, ırkçılık gibi şeylere kendini kaptırma. Eğer kaptırırsan insanı "insan" olarak görememeye başlarsın.

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Cognitive errors/ False beliefs

In cognitive therapy, cognitive errors are of massive importance. They are simply the things to work on in all cases.

I had an example of that in the subway and would like to share.
I was in the train sitting on a seat that faces the corridor. In trains or buses people always keep still and stare at the floor to avoid eye contact with others and so did I (bcs when I don't, I usually catch some yahoos' eyes which is not pleasurable :) ).

Back to the story...
While I was staring at the floor, a man's feet got my attention. They were very well-cared for, almost like he had just had a pedicure. However, his feet were firty and he was wearing a pair of cheap plastic sandals. I got curious about the guy and looked at his face. I was fascinated by the good condition of his feet but just after I looked at his face he got annoyed. He moved to the next section.

Indeed I was thinking positively of him but he got it in a wrong way. It was so obvious. How would he thought otherwise? He had cheap sandals on and I stared at his feet. I believe he would be shocked if he knew what I was thinking. So he misjudged me by thinking that I was judging him badly.

In daily life we all make this kind of errors. We believe that we are so sure about what the others are thinking. However, the truth may be very very different than our guesses. Mind reading seems to me as the most common cognitive error.

In some cases, its consequences can be harder than it was here. He moved to another place and avoided the disturbance. But when it happens with the people you give importance to, you get hurt for no reason.

I hope you will think about this when you catch yourself mind reading next time. ;)

The "need" to be perfect

Recently everybody is trying to look their best, do their best, simply be the best in every single area. However it is not possible for someone to be perfect at everything.

Media has a big role in this of course. The perfect body image that has been imposed on all of us seems to make us uncomfortable with our selves. Especially for women it is more severe than it is for men. Women feel that they need to be pretty to be something. That is not the case but still we feel that way. It is as if it has been expected from us. For men it is more like being "successful". However that "success" is not a easy thing to achieve because the perceived sense of "success" is being the best. Small successes aren't enough for anybody.

This perception shapes our world. Women can't stand looking at themselves because they think they do not look good enough. Lips, nose, boobs... They all "need" to be perfect in order to be considered beautiful.

It seems that women are almost racing for being the hottest. Being hot and being desired by men seem to be crucial for being liked.

On the other hand, men are trying to be the most powerful and because money is seen as the source of power they are competing on being the richest.

Having good manners or intellectuality don't mean a thing in pop culture. Many people get lost in this insane world. They lose their values and after doing such stupid things to get ahead they realize that it didn't mean a thing.

In most cases that realization happens to be too late for some things. However there is still a chance for all of us to make peace with ourselves through understanding this nonsense imposition.

We can forgive ourselves and move on.
We can accept ourselves just the way we are.
And we can transform ourselves into something meaningful, something natural.

I hope we can all have peace with ourselves and with others.

and yes, I know what I am talking about and I know how hard it is. Still there is hope for us to use our inner strength and get over all.

Peace on you!